I'm 18 I am adult why am I still here?
Also I sometimes write rubbish and there are people counting on me to write it? Like I have a publisher??? I don't know really how it happened but I have a book that will probably come out in 2015 maybe

 

snowtorch:

(seductively licks lips)

(grabs your wrist)

(furiously hits you with your own hand)

WHY ARE YOU HITTING YOURSELF WHY ARE YOU HITTING YOURSELF WHY ARE YOU HITTING YOURSELF WHY AR

Kid: Yeah give me a pack of Marlboro Reds.

Cashier: Are you 18?

Kid: It's okay, they're a metaphor.

adire-adire:

victorysunshine:

goldfish-kisses:

geek-in-a-box:

martiemcfly:

WHY ARENT THERE ADULT-SIZED PLAYGROUNDS

LIKE EVERYTHING IS THE SAME AS A KIDS PLAYGROUND

BUT BIGGER

WHY DO WE NOT HAVE THOSE

theme parks. just. theme parks.

but u have to pay for theme parks

that’s the adult part

son of a bitch

How Well Do Your Followers Know You?

fleshosphere:

Fill this out in my ask box! One point for every correct answer. Ten points total. I’ll reply with your total score!

First name:
Nickname:
Age:
Gender:
Sexual Orientation:

Nationality:
Relationship status:
Likes:
Dislikes:
Random fact:

BECAUSE I DON’T THINK THERE’S ANYONE CAN GET MORE THAN FOUR POINTS. AHAHAHAHAgods…

(Source: kanrose)

whatsacanada:

how do we even decide what our favorite colors are, are our brains just like “i like green because yea”

arrafrost:

indecentdrawer:

if someone is mean to you, don’t be mean back. talk to them, get to know them, be good friends, find out all the kinds of books/movies/tv series they love

then spoil it

image

selmabouvier:

i haven’t been to subway in 2 years cos the woman went “what bread do you want” and i went “yeah”

(Source: paulbearer)

marauders4evr:

anniekon:

whataboutthemenses:

lovelydestiel:

earthtohayley:

I FELT SO SORRY FOR HER IN THIS MOMENT.

like ok from the day she got on the hogwarts express, people were making fun of her and she’s never viewed as pretty or attractive until the moment in the first gif.

and because ron is fuckin jealous, he makes her feel like shit and ugh it’s like her one night of being someone else is just shattered and and and

WHY DID YOU D O THAT

I get really annoyed with people who are like “well she could have asked ron first instead of screaming at him to not use her as a last resort.”

well… no. She was asked by krum right away. She wanted to go with him. She wasn’t going alone and moaning that Ron hadn’t asked her. Her objection was to being treated like she should have been available to him, and being treated like she was lying about having a date. And who the fuck wouldn’t be offended by somebody thinking that they’re so undesirable that they made up a date?

this post actually made me almost cry no joke

And the fact that she’s sitting there alone unlike that other girl whose friends are comforting her because her one friend is the problem and she doesn’t want to upset her other friend because he’s got enough going on and it just breaks my heart.

(Source: deadpadfoot)

rninor:

weepingdildo:

landorus:

lets have phone sex over walkie talkies

"I’ll make you moan, over"

"bend over"
"bend what? over"

godblesstyleroakley:

2srooky:

andystjohn:

'girlfriend' by avril lavigne came out seven years ago

hey hey
you you
i don’t like your fun fact

No way
No way
I think you need to stop that